Poor neglected blog. Nobody loves you. Nobody thinks about you when you're not around. Nobody gives you a call to see if you're free on Friday night. Nobody asks you out for coffee. Sigh. Poor, poor blog.
Well, blog, you're just going to have to learn to entertain yourself, like the rest of us do. Get a hobby or two or three. Perhaps you should try needlepoint. Or tying flies. Join a gym and take yoga-kickboxing classes. Whatever. Just DO something. Don't keep sitting around waiting for someone else to jumpstart your life.
You know, blog, your ten-year high school reunion is coming up in a year or two. If you started now, you could have all your ducks in a row with plenty of time to spare. No need to do any last-minute crash dieting or futile job searching. Get a glamorous career started NOW. Make some interesting new friends and memories. And quit eating Almond Joys with your morning coffee.
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